Radiation Treatment - Day Thirteen

He began the day with enough energy to sing "... I'm radeeeeeoooooooACTIVE!" He felt well enough to do a service call first. He still didn't feel like eating, but he sure LOOKS good. Trim. A little pale, maybe, or sometimes he looks flushed.

We went to treatment on schedule, without event, except The Ex was unusually grumpy and tired, despite his little burst of humor early in the morning.

This afternoon, the exhausted Ex returned to work to perform another call. Ever the dedicated employee. It makes me proud when he wears his 20 years of service shirts (it's really been 22, but they don't make 22 year service shirts).

When we first met, he was a certified Honda motorcycle technician, but when that got hard for one of his age (30-something), I encouraged him to answer an ad from an office machines place.

Fixit people are fixit people. I knew he could learn to fix something besides motorcyles, even when he didn't. Guess my idea worked out ok, because he's still doing that work today, SCLC or not. He is a top-performing technician. One of the very best.

While he was away, I decided today was the day to say goodbye to our dear cat, who has been "wasting" for a couple weeks now. She wouldn't eat, barely drank. I just couldn't watch it any longer, so I called a friend to take me and beloved kitty to the vet to be put down.

We'd taken her to the vet last weekend and had orders to force feed her from a 6 ml syringe 10x per day. Antibiotics 2x per day, just in case she had a liver infection instead of liver cancer. She didn't care much for that either.

We just couldn't do it -- forcing food down her throat. We tried for a couple days, but she just wasn't having it, and we felt it might be hurting her more than just leaving her alone. But, today I was selfish. I just couldn't handle it any more. Poor little kitty, laying almost lifeless, staring off into nothingness. Waiting to die. Just what we need right now.

Today was the day to say goodbye to kitty.

Some dear friends helped us, even dug the grave and said the prayer, and brought a cool wrought iron cross to mark the grave. The Ex participated as much as he could, but we were both weepy today, and that was hard with friends visiting... even though they are caring, loving, DEAR friends.

So, while there is much going on in my mind to write about tonight, I feel I must keep it short, as the family -- especially the dog -- is mourning. I need to be in the livingroom with The Ex and the dog.

When I left for the vet this afternoon, The Ex whispered to our poor, sick kitty of 10 years, "Goodbye, little kitty. I'll see you again real soon."

Too sad.

More tomorrow. Hopefully, a better day.